A Friendly Letter from Home

In today’s dispatch from the other side of the world from me, your semi-snarky Serbian attaché–we have panic-inducing, fear-mongering cautionary “letters from home.” (Thanks to my friend, Corie Skolnick for the catchy “attaché” moniker.)

Just kidding, this wasn’t the exact language used.

Nevertheless, on increasingly frequent basis, I receive letters courtesy of my friendly neighborhood United States of America Embassy.

No doubt, Big Brother is in on it.* I had provided my email and cell phone to the Embassy–for the sole reason to be alerted as to when my daughter’s passport would become available. I did NOT sign up to receive these messages–via email or text message.

Curiously, there’s no “unsubscribe” button. Awesome.

News from the Embassy

Dateline Thursday, May 9, 2013

The U.S. Embassy informs U.S. citizens that the Serbian nationalist group NASI will hold a rally in downtown Belgrade tomorrow, Friday, May 10 to protest adoption of the Kosovo agreement. The protest is scheduled to begin at 12:44 p.m. in Republic Square (Trg Republike).

Organizers expect several thousand participants, and a heavy police presence is planned in the vicinity of the protest and throughout downtown Belgrade. Embassy personnel have been advised to avoid the area.

Just to clarify, what they really meant was Naši, pronounced Nashi, which means “ours” in Serbian. Also, U.S. intelligence was either faulty or  not complete. Naši was not the only group who helped organize the rally. It’s been reported by local Serbian media that the Democratic Party of Serbia, Serbs from the disputed territory in Northern Kosovo, and students from Belgrade also attended, along with a bishop from the Serbian Orthodox Church.

Details, shme-tails.

 The Embassy goes on to admonish:

We remind U.S. citizens that even demonstrations intended to be peaceful can become violent and unpredictable. You should avoid the areas around this event if possible, and exercise caution if you are within the vicinity of any large gatherings, protests, or demonstrations. Try to stay current with media coverage of local events and be aware of your surroundings at all times.

Review your personal security plans, remain aware of your surroundings, including local events, monitor local news stations for updates, and report specific incidences of targeted violence to the U.S. Embassy in Belgrade at the number below. Maintain a high level of vigilance and take appropriate steps to enhance your personal security.

Okay everybody, don’t get your panties in a bunch be alarmed. Belgrade is a very safe city, even for young women and children. The biggest “danger” of these protests is traffic … if you’re not up-to-date, you may inadvertently try to drive through a cordoned-off section of town; delaying your arrival by thirty minutes.

Are other Western countries so overly suspicious?

I checked with my friend, Bex, a British expat who used to live in Greece. Although the British government doesn’t constantly send her “security messages,” she had an American expat friend who received near daily warnings about the various austerity-measures protests.

My Canadian friend here in Serbia said that the only messages he receives from his embassy is party invitations. Good times. 

For a country like the United States who prides itself on our right to assembly, our right to free speech, and or right to protest against our government’s decisions, it seems we are pretty paranoid when others do the same.

Serbia has a democratically elected government, and it’s sad that it seems to be U.S. policy to be so reactionary towards peaceful protests. Just sayin’.

Questions for readers: Have other U.S. citizens living abroad had similar experiences? What about other expats and immigrants, what’s been the response of your home country to you living abroad? Serbs: does the Serbian government send you updates when shit goes down in America?

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* Dear CIA and Department of Homeland Security: Please don’t put me on any watch lists. It’s all in good fun

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